Do you want people to like you? Then start talking with style. This includes choosing your words, thinking before you speak, no swearing and making people feel comfortable by being friendly, sincere, kind, accommodating and respectful.
Most of all, avoid communication styles such as the following:
- Prescriber / aggressor – telling everyone what to do. “Do as I say!” or “That is not right. Do it like this.”
- Blamer – it is always someone else. “I didn’t do it” or “It’s not me, it’s them!”
- Avoider – everything is too much work. “Let’s just forget it” or “Do not worry so much, be happy!”
- Group follower – people pleaser and non-assertive. “If you say so” or “I will do what you guys want to do.”
- The distracter – pay little attention. “Oh, sorry, my mind was somewhere else” or “What were you saying?”
- Emotionalist – my feelings, my feelings, my feelings.
- Chatterbox – cannot stop talking and likes to interrupt.
- Sorry to be alive – floor mat. “Do not mind me” or “Nobody cares what I think anyway.”
- Don’t know – cannot / fearful to make choices and little drive. “I don’t know. You decide” or “Don’t worry so much. It will sort itself out.”
- The computer / know-it-all – always know better. “Let me tell you why you are wrong” or “I think it should be done like this.”
- The one-sider – does not consider the views of others. “The universe rotates around my side of the story. My view is the only view.”
People in general don’t like those who are aggressive or full of themselves, but they love people who are respectful and make them feel good. So, learn to talk with style and people will like you.
